construct. [kon-struhkt]

homecoming

2012-02-12T09:22:00.001-06:00

if you're like most people that grew up in my area, when you see the word homecoming you're reminded of an awkward teenage dance.

::pause for memories::

while that was the association i had for 19 years of my life, now when i think homecoming, i think of the following:

welcome home to 280 members of the 159 aviation brigade

kind of takes your breath away, doesn't it?

my sister was kind enough to let me capture the homecoming ceremony of her husband this week. i followed her family around for the day and documented the various parts of the day because this is the first homecoming that their kids have been old enough to attend and comprehend... and probably a little bit because my sister's husband is awesome and i'm super glad he is back home safe.

getting ready

anyone that has experienced a homecoming ceremony knows two things:
1. it is a process. the climax of the experience is at the ceremony... but the entire week/day leading up is a finely tuned production filled with a lot of hurry up and wait, (good) anxiety, and cleaning.

2. it is emotional, even if you do not know a single person getting off of the plane.

my absolutely beautiful sister

what i learned shooting this homecoming was that experiencing a homecoming with kids is far different. (that statement could probably be applied to most things. "experiencing a [fill in blank] with kids makes the event far different.")

very patriotic

the plane has touched down

the following series makes me very happy... it's the first moments of my brother-in-law's reunion with his family.

looking for dad with mom's help

and one final photo i would like to share:

everyone back together

side note: that smile on my niece's face is inherited from her mother and myself. i figured that out during this adventure.

profile photo

2012-02-09T19:21:00.001-06:00

oh, hey there new profile photo. i haven't had one of you for a while.

Chris and Adrienne's magic camera skills

photo snapped by the always talented Chris and Adrienne Scott.

make-up artistically applied by the wonderful Amy Lynn Larwig.

some shots from site

2012-02-04T15:35:00.001-06:00

when i was out in montana helping on builds, we were building with strawbale. most of those buildings had a thing called a "truth window." a truth window is basically a place in a building where you can open up the wall and see the strawbale behind it. it's a neat little piece of a strawbale structure that can be used for education, as a reminder, or just as a cool conversation point.

a few weeks ago, i went into one of my sites dry wells and i saw the following:

not quite a truth window...

fact: this is not a truth window. that opening gives a view into a wet well. for a split second though, it reminded me of my summers out in montana and it was strangely comforting. every once in a while this will happen. it's usually when i least expect it, but i am reminded of where i started. that's why i'm sharing this photo. because the second i walked in the door, i saw this and it brought me back.

the day i took these photos, there was not a lot going on when i got there, but there were reminders of the work that would start going on later that day/week everywhere.

ready to go

these shots are my favorite to take. and, luckily, there are many opportunities to capture them. i guess it's the feeling of anticipation that i get when i look at them, or the fact that if you wanted to you could visualize exactly what may happen in the hours to come. (see photo below.)

going over drawings

2012-02-02T08:46:00.003-06:00

fishing princess

seven years ago, my niece was born. i have been privileged enough to be in the same area with her since she was three and the thing no one ever tells you about nieces is that they have the amazing ability to alter the way you see the world.

take the above photo for example: i was always afraid she would get older and start loving pink, frilly things and want to be a girly girl. i mean, i am not the largest fan of pink, i own nothing frilly, and i would not classify myself as particularly girly (i sweat; i do not glisten). my concerns ran wild.. if she grew up to be the polar opposite of the things i know, how would i help her navigate through life? i mean, what if she didn't relate to me? what if she didn't feel comfortable talking to me about things when she needed help?

then there she is... wearing a pink, frilly outfit wanting to go fishing after finishing a hike with me at Dunbar Cave without even taking a breath she was talking so much. (the idea that this child would ever not be able to talk to me is laughable now.) my fears came true... and i was worried about nothing. funny how that happens.

i keep telling her she has to stop growing up so fast, but she doesn't listen. it's turning out okay though because she's one amazing little kid.

seven years of lessons from a small, ginger child. wouldn't trade a single one of them for anything else in the world.

happy birthday little one!

nothing rhymes with orange...

2012-01-26T13:06:00.000-06:00

...but you can rhyme with clementine.

example:
i really love to eat clementines.
i eat them often when i dine.
they are a very tasty treat,
so lots of clementines i do eat.

i could have stopped at dine, but it felt incomplete. so, there we are.

ponder: how does one tell when a clementine has expired and is no longer safe to eat?
assumptions of ponder: there is no mold and no odd smell, but you've had the clementine for a while and you're just worried that it may no longer be in a prime eating zone.

family portraits

2012-01-20T16:30:00.003-06:00

before the holiday, a women i work with asked if i could come over and try to photograph her family. when i arrived at her house i figured out why she said "try"-- 5 grandchildren, all boys, all under the age of 5 (with no naps that day, though that part was not planned)!

a very good looking family

i won't lie to you, at first i was a little intimidated, but they were such a great family to shoot. lots of personalities and lots of energy! and the kids warmed up to me so quickly that it was easy to get some great shots of everyone.

cousins are awesome

did i mention there were twins?

love this one!

Huey

2012-01-15T14:47:00.000-06:00

Huey

this photo is my current favorite of our black lab, Huey. Huey is probably the most laid back dog i have ever trained. he's a huge puppy -- at 1 year old, he is 90 pounds -- so, he still has his moments. but, he's blessed with the sweetest demeanor and this photo highlights it to me, as i was curled up in front of the fire reading with Huey faithfully laying by me, staring, the entire time...

except for the minute i pulled out my camera, then he posed.

Huey posing for me

playground adventure

2012-01-14T12:59:00.000-06:00

there isn't a large story behind these photos... they were mostly just fun to take while i was babysitting the other weekend.

Connor and the slide

Joe trying to kick my camera.

he was cold

my favorite. lots of movement.

Arlington Cemetery

2011-12-31T09:49:00.005-06:00

my husband had not been to the Washington, D.C. area since he was 8. so, when we went up for the week, we spent a good portion of our time being tourists. i may post other touristy photos later, but our last stop, on Christmas day, was at Arlington Cemetery, and it was where i took my favorite photos of the trip. (aside from the photos of my family... those are pretty awesome too.)

walkway to the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

we ended up arriving in time to see the changing of the guard. call me old fashioned, but i couldn't bring myself to take photos of the actual ceremony. i did snap a few once it was over and the one below turned out to be my favorite.

the new guard after taking over

in all my time living in the area, i had never been to Arlington around Christmas. i heard about wreaths at most of the grave sites -- according to the linked article, this year 90,000 wreaths were placed by 15,000 people, an impressive and humbling piece of information -- but never took the opportunity to see it in person.

grave sites with wreaths

after finally seeing this, i am very thankful that my husband wanted to go be a tourist in my home town.

the last photo is my favorite of all my shots at the cemetery:

view from the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

all in all, it was a good way to spend a few hours on Christmas day... and something i hope we can do again in the future.

christmas in virginia

2011-12-26T12:23:00.000-06:00

when you experience a Christmas with children, there is an appreciation for the things that you never remember about your own holidays. (well, maybe most people remember it, but i have a horrible memory.. so i do not.) this photo, for me, brings back the feeling leading up to Christmas when i was young. my niece and nephew, having been told they could open one gift on Christmas Eve, eve, eagerly await the arrival of Pop Pop. two minutes later, my niece was out on the front porch yelling "Pop Pop hurry up!" as he meandered his way up our street.

now, for me, my fondest memories (that i do remember) of Christmas all center around decorating our tree. i'm sure i impatiently waited for presents and woke up at 04:00 just to see what Santa brought me, but i do not remember that as much as i remember sitting around unwrapping all the various ornaments we had collected over the years with my siblings and parents. so, naturally, i spent a disproportionate amount of time snapping photos of the tree.

it is hard to believe that we are already closing the calendar on the 2011 year... but getting my first Christmas in the same place as my husband was a pretty sweet gift for me (and all i really wanted!). hope everyone had as great of a holiday season as i did!

plagiarize.

2011-12-17T12:53:00.000-06:00

here is a fun fact about me: i do not like it when someone takes credit for work i did.

here is a fun fact about people: people do not like it when someone takes credit for work that they have not done, especially if the work they have not done is work that those people themselves did do.

are we following?

in general, i am far more patient when someone excludes me from or takes credit for my work with my permission.

example:
person: good morning! i am going to be putting together a presentation to give about a project, in which you've been intimately involved. do you have any interest in participating in said presentation?
me: no, thanks. let me know if you need help though.

also, in general, i am far less patient when someone excludes me from or takes credit for my work without my permission.

example:
me at a conference: wait a minute... that's my project! ::anger monsters::*

in conclusion, use your pleases and thank yous and always ask permission to plagiarize.

*note lack of anger monsters in previous example.

art shots

2011-12-16T21:01:00.000-06:00

if you've been reading my blog for longer than this post, you know that my sister is an amazing artist. (check out her website here, or buy some of her work at her etsy site here.)

recently, she has been asking me to take photos of her new pieces, so i wanted to share some of these shots. this is a relatively new category of photos for me, so i am finding it challenging... especially shooting glass. but it has been fun so far! (and, who knows, maybe it will help someone appreciate her work!)

wine glass set

tree of life canvas

country roads

i will share more of her pieces in the future. kate has been creating at least one piece a month, so i'll probably have more to share soon!

holiday gremlin

2011-12-12T16:49:00.004-06:00

joey and scott, gremlin style

we were waiting for his sister's holiday concert to start for over 30 minutes (aka: forever in munchkin world) and joey started to turn a little gremlin-esque, so scott put him up on his shoulders... then i asked him to smile. and this is what i got. love.

meanwhile, way down south in texas..

2011-12-10T17:59:00.000-06:00

one of the advantages of having a spouse in the military and, therefore, consistently going places for training is that (sometimes) you get to go and experience somewhere new. while i cannot usually match up my schedule with his to make this happen, i was able to do so while he was down in San Antonio, Texas for a few months. i only got to stay about a day, but it was a much needed trip... and it was pretty nice to see my fella, too.

we spent most of my time there wandering around downtown and happened upon a church that caught my eye... mostly because it had a fallout shelter, but also because it was beautiful.

the fallout shelter

interior of a church we visited

exterior of the before-mentioned church

we also came across an occupy protest. so, i'd say it was a successful trip.

tis the season

2011-12-03T19:01:00.001-06:00

the (decorated for Christmas) Roxy

last night i had the good fortune of suiting up and going to dinner downtown with my husband and our good friend. we had an amazing time catching up over pizza and beer.. then they both humored me and accompanied me while i took a few test shots around downtown Clarksville.

the Roxy (featuring an appropriate play)

those of you that know me know that i really don't like being cold and also dislike crowded places. so, some things about this season aren't my favorite. but i have to admit that the downtown decorations/lights are one of my favorite parts about living in this area. i pretty much look forward to it as soon as i see the guys out setting up.

ARTifacts and (part of) the main strip

the standard photo... third year running. do you see us?

after this outing, i am seriously excited about seeing everything lit up. (until the parade, there are no lights on the christmas tree.) there will be many more photos to come, but i just wanted to share a few from this first outing. hope everyone is keeping warm!

shameless plug of sister awesomeness

2011-12-02T14:44:00.000-06:00

see this? it's my (our, whatevs) holiday card this year. isn't it amazing? the correct answer is yes. it is the most amazing, heart warming card you have probably ever seen. (i say probably just in case you have had your own card designed by this artist. obviously, then, your card would seem more amazing to you than a card with a cartoon version of myself and my husband on it.)

sure, i may be a little biased by the fact that the person who designed it is my sister/best friend. but i have yet to meet a person who sees my sister's artwork and doesn't respond to it. ipso facto, she's the most amazing artist in the world. (my logic = unbeatable)

go check her out yourself: http://www.kreatesomething.com/

underground people

2011-11-27T17:33:00.001-06:00

about 25' underground in the Old Russellville Pike Pump Station

i started working on the "1000 Year Clarksville Flood Recovery" team in August of 2010. when i started, i was going to 11 pump stations daily. the smaller stations (4) were all returned to working order within the first year of the flood event. one large station was in the works of being renovated prior to the May 2010 event and was contracted under a different consulting firm. the remaining six larger pump stations all had to be redesigned (code states that any major renovations require all current codes are met. these stations were built over 30 years ago, so....)

as the contractor was just approved to start work on 10/31, they began demolition on the damaged sections of the first two major (out of six major) pump stations recently. this shot was from a trip out to the Old Russellville site with the QA/QC guy and the Project Manager from the City. i liked it... so, now you get to see it. (you can thank me later.)

meet: Becker

2011-11-15T19:26:00.001-06:00

Becker is sad

meet Becker, a 1-year-old pitt mix that is a big puppy weighing in at 60 pounds. he is our current foster dog with the Humane Society here and he is sad because he has yet to find his new home.

Becker and Huey

Becker would function best in a one dog household that is very active. he is still a puppy, so he has to be worked with and is much better behaved when he has been run a mile (though i suggest closer to 5!). as you can see in the photo above, he and Huesuf used to be best buds; however, somewhere along the way, Becker became aggressive towards Huey, so we now need to keep them separated -- hence the desire to find him an owner that only wants one pup!

Becker at an adoption event

Becker knows quite a few commands (sit, down, stay, leave it, etc.) and is 100% housebroken, as well as crate trained. he does well with kids, but i would recommend older children because he is such a puppy and plays somewhat rough. he is comfortable with people in uniform. he will bark to let you know that someone is at the door, which is a characteristic i really appreciate! he will also bark just to let you know he's there -- a characteristic i appreciate less, but am working with.

Becker taking a break

he learns quickly and is doing well on a leash, but i do recommend walking him with a halte/gentle leader because, without it, he will pull. we are still working on the rules of fetch -- he is struggling with bringing the ball back -- but he enjoys playing. as i said before, he is a little rougher when he plays, so he would do better with an owner that has some experience.

fetch!

if you are interested, please let me know!!

mr. frog

2011-11-15T17:10:00.001-06:00

::ribbit::

a photo from this summer that i found on my old camera after crawling around trying to get macro shots of magnetic flow meter id's at work. (did you understand that? if so, we can be friends.)

sure, it's not really focused correctly... but, i'm a pretty big fan of the shot. probably because it reminds me of taking it -- picture me chasing a frog around in the dark on the 4th of july and you may like it more too.

october 31st

2011-11-03T20:46:00.001-05:00

a ballerina fairy vampire princess waiting to get laced up

ah yes... halloween. the day where little girls get to be fairy ballerina vampire princesses. sadly, they still must wait to get their shoes tied up by their moms... same as all the peasants. ::sigh::

sandhill cranes.

2011-10-29T12:35:00.002-05:00

sandhill cranes in my aunt's front yard in melbourne, florida. these two were very patient with me moving ever closer towards their (endangered species classified) personal space. alas, they got annoyed enough with me to walk away... after barking at me. i tried to figure out where i'd heard that sound before and, after a while, i realized that the jurassic park raptor barks must have been recordings of these guys. turns out i was not far off -- though it was African Cranes not sandhill. (at least according to wikipedia.)

fall soccer

2011-10-08T18:27:00.001-05:00

having coached most of the same girls for the past 3 years, this year is shaping up for a different kind of season. the girls are finally starting to put it all together! offense, defense, passing... it's starting to look more and more like a soccer game. i'm pretty excited about it.

soccer players!

construction.

2011-09-20T07:30:00.005-05:00

i like photos of construction sites.

that's a true story. sure it doesn't have a lot of details or even an excessive amount of words, but i'm a sucker for a short story.

Leo the model on College Street

hazy morning light

Superman

turtles... and such.

2011-07-20T13:30:00.000-05:00

i have always wanted to spend a month in Costa Rica helping sea turtle babies meander their way out to the ocean or protecting their eggs from their evil (aka natural) predators. i'm not really sure why... maybe it's my strong affinity for Pixar movies -- which began with Finding Nemo, maybe it is how cute small turtles can be, or perhaps that huge, 500-year old turtle i hung out with at a petting zoo when i was younger really made an impact. either which way, i've always liked turtles. so, when i was sitting in a sewer rehab meeting and learned that, right here in my very own little town, we had about 20 turtles that had wandered into a broken manhole and ended up in a wet well of a pump station... my life-long desire to save some turtles kicked into high gear. the next day, i came to work armed with determination, bypassed dropping off my stuff in the office, and went straight in to request of Murff that i be allowed to take part in the Great Turtle Rescue of 2011. (i titled it that myself.)

so... Murff, Alex, Brad, Mike, and myself all headed out to the wet well.

and we saved some turtles. (photo proof provided below.)

and, my favorite photo of the entire event... having nothing to do with saving turtles.. Mr. Murff searching for a manhole:

a few words on family.

2011-05-19T13:39:00.000-05:00

i was given two pieces of advice recently from members of my family:

1. from my sister: "if you yell it at me, it doesn't make it any more true of a statement; it just makes it louder."

2. from my nephew: "i will give you a kiss because that will help your head feel better. that's all you need."

the first statement is true -- yelling does solely make what you're saying louder and volume does not particularly add validity to a statement. if you find yourself yelling, perhaps the issue is not that the person isn't listening [what is the difference between listening and hearing?! ::draws communication diagram::], but that your argument is flawed. so what's the underlying message here? there isn't one really... at least not one i want to divulge into.

the second statement, at the time, was not really true at all -- i'd just come home from the hospital and it felt as though my brain was my worst enemy and would explode at any moment. in fact, i'd been prescribed a few pretty powerful medications and none of them had remotely worked. but for this one, there was an underlying message -- my nephew thinks that love can fix anything/it is all you need. this seems to be a valid point of view, since the beatles wrote an entire song based on it... and i'm pretty sure the 60's/70's were based on it as well.

they aren't earth shattering... but i found these two pieces of advice to be filled with simple wisdom, so there you go. from my family to yours, stop yelling so much and kiss each other when things hurt.

slight variations

2011-04-18T14:49:00.000-05:00

do you have a dream? or do you have a vision? or do you have a calling?

defined:

dream: (albeit the sixth on the list of possible definitions) an aspiration; goal; aim

vision: (2nd) the act or power of anticipating that which will or may come to be

calling: (2nd/3rd/4th) vocation, profession, or trade; a call or summons; a strong impulse or inclination

i would imagine that some people would argue these are all varying degrees of the same concept. you have a dream, it becomes a vision, and you discover it is your calling. some may say they are all one in the same. and some may say they have none of the three.

i would be a part of the latter congregation. not because i do not agree with the other statements, but because i've never had dreams; i rarely have a vision; and to say that i have a calling would be exaggerating the combination of luck and hard work that i have encountered. ("i have found that the harder i work, the more luck i seem to have." ah, thomas jefferson.. you complete me.)

to be fair, and to add in the varying opinions i've been given because this is my blog and i can, i have been told before that i am the living proof of an interventionist god. (this, in my book, being the really nice way of saying, "you're not really good at anything, but you still get a lot of opportunities and i cannot figure out why.") i think this is just untrue. there are many reasons for it -- mainly that i do not believe in a god that would intervene. he seems more like a guy who would sit back and just watch things unfold, really only caring about the way you respond to them. can't you just see him/her now? "ooo, she chose to go left. ballsy choice, evey. ballsy."

i also don't believe this because i know how hard i have worked for things in my life. sure, there's no overarching goal or end state that i am trying to obtain, but that's okay. in fact, one could argue that makes my experiences more meaningful and “pure.” i am not looking to gain anything; i am there 110%.

in conclusion (i really love saying that), i think it would be giving myself far too much credit if i said i've ever had a dream, a vision, or a calling that has motivated me to follow a destined path towards my definition of greatness. (how do i define greatness? an excellent question…) i also think it's a bit haphazard to say that my life is a product of an interventionist god and i had no choice in where i went, but here i am.

my life is a product of disaster, success, injury, insult, love, passion, wandering around lost, dancing in the rain, falling down a lot, calculated risk, heartache, and hard work. but mostly, my life has come to be the result of me saying yes. given an opportunity, i usually jump and see where it leads me. sometimes, i find really nifty little places/treasures and other times i find really scary dead ends/haunted houses. either way, i showed up, i followed a path, it led me somewhere else... i'm now wandering down this new path... (pete and repeat got in a boat.)

have you ever read the book Being There? it's all about this same concept. it's about 100 pages long too, so no excuses. (play like a champion.)

west wing, my favorite tv show of all time, ingrained into my head that decisions are made by the people who show up.

i believe my life is a product of showing up. and laughing… laughing too.

an incredibly happy baby...

2011-04-01T22:50:00.000-05:00

this is my favorite photo from a shoot i did a few weeks ago... doesn't he just make you smile?!

meet buddy, the foster dog.

2011-02-01T18:57:00.000-06:00

i decided to foster for the Humane Society a few weeks ago. (for those of you that do not know about the foster program: the Humane Society receives dogs and they find them foster homes -- much like foster homes for kids. people train, love and work with the dogs until the humane society can find the animal a "forever home.")

last week, i received a call about a stray (buddy) that was found wandering around in the streets. he was saved by a couple and they wanted to keep him, but they just could not. i agreed to foster him and i was to pick him up thursday, but received a phone call that the original family had found him a home.

then, i got a call saturday -- the people at the new home had decided to let buddy out without a leash and he had run off. long story short... buddy was hit by a car friday night. i picked him up sunday morning and he is now recovering in my home. he has a "full leg" cast on his left front leg from a (cleanly) broken femur.

so far, buddy is an incredibly sweet dog. he learned to sit in 45 minutes and now does so any time i have food, no matter what kind (though i have learned he does not enjoy apples). he is loving and is handling the break with more humility than i would, though i like to think of him as a kindred spirit -- we both have had major injuries to our legs... and we're both pretty awesome.

so, without further ado... meet buddy....

buddy... a curious lil' guy.

buddy's full leg cast

kate and i are going to make him a little vest that says "i'm a humane society foster dog... ask about me!" i'm hoping that he will progress through this little hiccup quickly and we can find him his "forever home." he deserves it. (and i'll update when i can about him.)

oh. hai there jelly.

2011-01-28T22:31:00.001-06:00

jellyfish at the aquarium in Gatlinburg, TN.

92990

2010-12-07T08:53:00.001-06:00

my photographer friend told me once that he falls in love with most of his subjects... and then they promptly break his heart. this friend is a wedding photographer, so it is obvious from the beginning what his outcome is going to be... but, nevertheless, he falls for them every time. and, although this is somewhat sweet, i never quite understood what he was talking about.

and then there was yesterday. and i'm all shook up.

heartbroken as i am, it will all be okay... just like my photographer friend told me. once he's away from his subjects, it all goes away. but, for that brief moment in time, he is in love...

and it sure feels real when it ends.

09.26.2010: night work.

2010-09-27T07:20:00.000-05:00

i am a sucker for photos that have anything to do with construction, so i suppose it is a good thing that i work in the field. this shot is of a night dig to install a temporary fix on a sewer line from flood damage. those two guys were getting ready to suit up and head down into that pit, cut into a sewage line, and hope that it went well. i did not see a lot of praying prior to entry into the pit. not saying it was needed, just saying i would have been. anyway, i was there to observe for my job, but i couldn't help taking a few photos. this is how i spend my friday nights. pretty cool if you ask me... and smelly. smelly too.

09.19.2010: my spidey senses are tingling.

2010-09-26T21:08:00.001-05:00

i won't lie... i'm not totally sure when i took this photo, but i thought it was necessary to highlight for two reasons: 1. i was close enough to a spider this large for long enough to take a series of shots of it... and 2. how cool is that web?

09.12.2010: foggy mornings

2010-09-24T15:07:00.001-05:00

this photo is probably not that aesthetically pleasing to most people, but i love it. i have a new job moonlighting as an environmental/project engineer. so, i am out on sites every morning checking on pumps. when i pulled up to swan lake, i looked over and there was fog on the lake. i only had my point-and-shoot, but i wanted the image anyway... so, i snapped a photo of just the lake and, for some reason, i backed up and included the stop sign/street signs in a second shot. when i uploaded the photos and saw this one... it became my favorite photo of the week. something about the way the stop sign, the tree, and the cave entrance all just kind of... balance each other out. add in the fog.. and i am one happy photo taking lady.

for the love of watermelon.

2010-09-06T20:39:00.001-05:00

this photo is of my niece. (surprise!) we had some friends over and were all enjoying some watermelon... i snapped this shot and it quickly became my favorite.

Hannah eating her watermelon

butterflies in the sky.. i can fly twice as high.

2010-06-24T08:52:00.002-05:00

welcome to summer.

25.

2010-06-14T15:40:00.003-05:00

here are 25 idiosyncrasies about me, myself, and i. why? one may ask.. because i can and i haven't written in a while... and i'm bored out of my mind.

25. i consistently try to find the most efficient way to do anything i have to do more than once (examples: cooking, getting ready for work, and household chores). this rule applies to everything, unless i am driving. if i am driving, i go the same way every time... mostly because i don't want to have to think about things and i pay no attention to street signs. so, other than driving, if you are speaking to me and doing something, i'm probably not listening because i am analyzing how you could've done it more efficiently.

13. when i was 5-18, i literally thought i could do anything in the entire world. there are often moments where the 5 year old inside of me screams back at the 25 year old i have become "WHY NOT?" and stomps her feet. when this occurs, i don't know if i should see it as an inspirational reminder to myself or as a really annoying, persistent piece of me that should just go away already.

7. i mostly believe that rules are more suggested guidelines than actual lawful things. i give myself 3 months to learn the rules of whatever new situation i am in, then i spend the next 3 months testing them, and then i know which rules are suggestions and which rules actually have consequences.... and then i go from there.

16. i don't really like to talk, i hate talking on the phone, and i don't have a knack with small talk. basically, networking events are like my worst nightmares. i navigate through them fine.. but all the stuff i find interesting (ie: sex, religion, and politics) are off limits and usually you're stuck in a room with a group of 25-100 people for an excruciatingly long time. don't get me wrong, i like most people.. i just don't want to talk to them. i get along the best with people who like to go do things while we are talking. i mean, we're all special flowers or whatever.. but most stories follow the same plot lines and, though you think you are unique, i probably do not (i state this out of love and honesty). but, if you want to go rock climbing and tell me about your unique floweredness... then i'm in. i can listen to you for HOURS and do something else at the same time.

4. i'm a pretty low-maintenance person. usually, if it is a saturday, i roll out of bed, wash my face, throw on a t-shirt/sweatshirt/jeans/boots, and get going. i dislike make-up and i really hate wearing my hair down... but my absolute favorite thing in the world is to get dressed up in a ball gown.

10. i'm a huge advocate of personal responsibility. if you did it, take responsibility for it. it's that simple.

18. i think you can interpret how close you are to a person based off of pretty simple questions. "what is your biggest fear?" being one of the most telling.

22. it bothers me when people assign emotions to me or my actions that i am clearly not displaying... it tells me that the person i am talking to doesn't care enough about the people around them to actually look for non-verbal cues. instead, they just assign stereotypical reactions and their belief of what they feel your emotions should be. this tells me that they are lazy. laziness annoys me.

12. i love being outside.

1. 99% of the time, i don't think it is worth it to start a fight. there are probably 10 people in this world that i care enough about to fight with. this may seem backwards, but it is the truth.

17. i have had knee surgery on my left knee, broken my right ankle numerous times, broken various fingers/toes, had a huge needle stuck into my spine, and snapped my left shin in half. i have found that asking the question: "is this going to hurt?" is useless.

21. i thought that at a certain point people would grow up and life would become filled with long, intense conversations that respected viewpoints and made everyone involved grow and think, all while working towards making the world a better place. i've found that is not the case the majority of the time and this has been my biggest disappointment with life thus far.

5. life can throw just about anything at me and i fully believe that i will work my way through it and be better for it. and i've made some pretty big mistakes.. so this has been tested.

23. i believe an education is the most important investment that you can make in yourself. and "an education" doesn't necessarily mean a college degree, though that is the conventional way of obtaining it.

11. i used to have a lot of trouble sleeping.. then i got into meditation.. and i didn't have trouble sleeping anymore. this happened somewhere in the age range of 18-20 and it happened because i read a book on meditation and it just made sense. it was around this same time period that i realized that if something made logical sense, then i could accept it and apply it. if it was solely based on emotion, then i could neither accept it, nor apply it to anything. and thus began my reign of logic.

2. i get on kicks where all i want to read about is one very specific thing. when i am on one of those kicks, i read like 5 books a month. then i'll go for months without reading much of anything. apparently i'm pretty all or nothing.

8. 8 and 5 are my lucky numbers because they are the numbers i've worn in every sport i have ever played. (in other words: soccer.)

19. i usually don't care enough to hold grudges for very long. it just takes too much energy. i'd rather just forgive and move on than hold onto all that anger.

3. i think the most important part of life is showing up. if you show up, you can do something, change something, or create something. if you don't show up, you just end up wondering what you might've missed.

15. i want to spend my life helping people. sounds cheesy, i know. but if i look back on my life and see that what i did, every day, was try to positively impact the small pieces of the world i touched.. i will consider myself a success and be proud of whatever i have accomplished.

20. i love music and memorize lyrics like it is my job. it is, in fact, not my job though. so at some point it'd be cool if my brain would help me out and memorize tasks as easily as i memorize lyrics.

6. i'm extremely sarcastic and find this gets me into trouble often and much. especially down south. ::giggle::

14. i love to take photos but i'm not quite at the point where i'm ready to call myself a photographer. my goal is to try and tell the stories of the things i photograph.

sometimes...

2010-05-14T13:44:00.000-05:00

when i least expect it... god gives me a thunderstorm and a camera. in this case, he also provided really long lightening strikes, since all i had was my point and shoot.

super powers.

2010-04-21T15:23:00.001-05:00

i've noticed recently that my life is divided into two, seemingly opposite, worlds. i call these worlds universe one and universe two. (creativity is found only among the few and elite of us. don't be jealous.)

universe one is largely played out in my head and my head only. in this universe, i am the courageous, hard-bodied, soft-hearted, super powered, everyday citizen. i can simultaneously stop all injustice and cook dinner.

universe two is reality. in this universe, i am myself.

often, there are situations where my dual universe personalities are caught in limbo, fighting emotion and logic to decide which universe will win; an epic battle itself. in these situations, i usually play out in my head how it would go if universe-two-me decided to run into a phone booth and transform into universe-one-me. [there wouldn't be any costume change or anything -- the ultimate super power of my universe-one-self would be that no one would know i was a super hero until i stepped in and became one. ::secret weapon punch::]

the top three bad guys that my universe-one-self would annihilate:
1. bad management (i'd say leadership but if you can't manage, you definitely can't lead)
2. illogical arguments ("THAT DOESN’T EVEN MAKE SENSE")
3. people who cannot conjugate verbs correctly

happy wednesday, injustice. i shall defeat you. one day.

frankly advice tastes evil (FATE)

2010-04-08T13:33:00.002-05:00

dear fate,

while it has been fun believing in your omnipotent powers and glory, i am giving up on you. it has been a long and painful decision, but i just have to break it off. i didn't want to tell you to your face, so i decided to write it down and let you stumble upon it later. sure, you could classify this as immature and avoidant, but the way i see it, i'm doing both of us a favor.

by the time you read this, i'll be long gone. it's for the best. really.

i'll always love you,

me ::sob::

::rawr:: ::snarl:: ::growl::

2010-02-04T15:34:00.001-06:00

random bear attack!

and you thought it was just a typical thursday.

here is a short story for today.

2010-02-03T08:46:00.004-06:00

upon careful reflection, she decided it was probably a bad idea to involve authorities. having been in several awkward situations before, this was not the time to start owning up and taking responsibility.

she eased back into her runners pace -- 7 minute miles -- and continued on her morning jog. her feet hitting the pavement with a rhythmic pounding that settled her mind and allowed her to focus on anything outside of the decision she had just made.

the end. (i call it a cliff-hanger.)

i've decided that...

2010-01-27T12:38:00.003-06:00

... i'd much prefer to be a skittle than an m&m.

this is based on 3 things:
1. skittles all somewhat taste the same but you can distinctly differentiate their flavors. m&m's are all the same.
2. m&m's are supposed to melt in your mouth but not in your hand. in reality, m&m's melt anywhere they feel like melting. that's false advertising and, quite honestly, just plain messy.
3. skittles taste both sweet and salty. makes for the perfect mix. m&m's are just plain chocolate.

that's all i have so far.

observation #362

2010-01-21T09:34:00.003-06:00

i realize that networking is important, but whenever i walk into events i am constantly wondering who at these meetings really thinks they are any different than the next guy. [as i am pondering this, i am inevitably approached by a guy in a suit (blue/black/brown) who shakes my hand and tells me, "hi. i'm so-and-so from such-and-such. it is so great to meet you!" we'll talk for anywhere from 5 - 15 minutes and then they will see someone else that they want to engage and wander off... quickly being replaced by the next guy in a suit (blue/black/brown) who shakes my hand and... de ja vu. i have seen this episode before.]

i understand that each of these people are important, either to themselves or to someone at this meeting. i just can't quite figure out how. i think of them as pop-outs: a person easily replaced by the next; one that has a similar story and is of similar importance... pop one out, pop the next one in... barely even notice the difference. one could probably continue the previous conversation with the new person and never even miss a beat.

so, i stand in the back; i'm watching. there they all are, wandering around trying to figure out how to use everyone they meet to the best of their abilities like loyal little worker bees. [advice given at my first networking training event: "figure out how you can use them in the first 5 minutes of the conversation; if you can't do that, drop them. they aren't worth your time."] they all have an elevator speech, which they flawlessly recite to one another, expertly hitting their marks in this play. this bad play; or, at the very least, this mediocre play that gets rave reviews but disappoints, having expected far more. and then they move on to the next and the next and the next... until someone gets on the microphone up front and tells them it is time to sit and listen. ::sigh of relief felt among the bees, for it is their allotted break time::

in this sea of similarities, how do i differentiate tom from joe? susan from cindy? helpful hint: check out name tags. i like to hide mine in a place that one can't normally find easily. i enjoy the hint of panic that filters across a face when they can't use my name in their handshake.

it is the little things in life..

cleaning house.

2010-01-14T10:58:00.003-06:00

it is the smallest of moments that help me see clearly and remind me to be grateful. they happen every day, if i allow myself to see them. i read a book once, Autobiography of a Face, that said (something along the lines of): "sometimes the smallest moments take you in and demand that you live the rest of your life in reference to them." i believe that is the truth.

waldo

2009-10-26T15:37:00.003-05:00

after much deliberation, i have decided... that what i should be for halloween... is.... waldo.

waldo!

here's the plan: rsvp as attending. then, i'll just not go anywhere.

whenever someone texts saying "where are you?"

i'll say "what? you can't find me?"

perfect.

random thought

2009-10-22T13:33:00.000-05:00

i really want to find someone running a marathon, jog up next to them, and say:

"hey. don't rush. it's a marathon. not a sprint."

colors.

2009-08-05T08:51:00.004-05:00

contemplation: if you were to classify yourself as a color, what color would you be and why?

in the scheme of life, i would argue, you encounter yourself as many different colors. currently, i would classify myself as a red-orange speckled with some blue-green, random silver specks mixed in... so you can never quite know what you're going to get, but i'm reliable enough so that you know you can get what you need (if you just try hard enough).

though, i imagine, that isn't the answer for which you are searching. you want me to tell you "blue" (because i am so reliable and everyone likes me) or "red" (because i am passionate and fiery), so that you can classify me with all the other colors and make sure that, in your box of crayons, you have all colors accounted for -- starting first with the 12-color basic-box and moving forward until you are the 64-color mega-box -- each crayon accounting for it's place and function (mixing to allow other, new colors, to exist).

so, i suppose, we have reached an impasse.

pick me up.

2009-06-11T07:33:00.006-05:00

lately, in class, i've been coming up with pickup lines/cute sayings inspired by the content of the day.

example:
if you were a tree, i'd plainsaw you because i wouldn't want to waste one bit.
or
i love you like montmorillonite loves water.

this is my way of doing two things:
1. trying to remember the content.
2. trying to amuse myself for 3 hours of going into such minute detail about topics such as wood.

thought of the week.

2009-05-22T13:40:00.001-05:00

for people who are so concerned about safety, you'd think construction people wouldn't manufacture pencils you have to sharpen with a knife. i mean... i'm just saying... if you have to use a knife to sharpen it, the likelihood of having a "lost time" injury probably increases as compared to pencils that you sharpen in a sharpener. sure maybe then it rolls off the table and you reach down to pick it up and accidentally fall off of the roof. but, of the two, which is more likely? stabbing yourself? or forgetting you're on a roof and falling off of it?

pick your poison, construction guy.